"I need some Mommy time, NOW!"
Okay, I hear you, I said to my 8 year old son. He has gotten very good at asking for my time when he needs it. I try to make sure he gets that need met. I came home from a weekend away, hurried back for my daughter’s 6th birthday party and was totally focused on her and the party for the rest of the day. The next morning my son said “My weekend sucked!” I did not fuss at him for using a word I don’t like, I just listened. He told me why and I gave him a hug, told him I was sorry it sucked and scheduled a date for later that week. Off he went to school with a smile on his face!
When I was going through my parent coaching certification a couple of years ago, one of the classes was called Connection Parenting and was taught by Pam Leo. Check out her website at www.connectionparenting.com. This was one of the most powerful and insightful classes about parenting that I experienced. It touched my heart deeply and changed me as a parent forever. I guess you could say it was like a big, loud wake-up call. One of the simple things we can do to connect with our children, she said, was to spend one-on-one time with each child. She called the time spent together “Mommy time” or “Conner time” and everyone in the our family knows that it is a sacred moment not to be shared except by the two people participating. Sometimes our “Maggie time” is simple, reading a book or playing Barbie. Sometimes, my schedule is crazy and I have to be more creative.
Last night, shopping for new shoes and winter clothes for Conner became “Conner time” and by calling it “Conner time,” it made it more special. We shopped, we ate chocolate, we talked, we giggled, he told me how cool he looked in his new clothes…nothing special or planned but we both came hope happy and relaxed.
Maggie knows her turn is coming. She and I love to grocery shop together, do crafts or read books. She loves me to be her audience while she sings along to Power Puff Girls on her karaoke machine. It’s not about WHAT you do, it’s about HOW you set the intention. It’s about focusing on one child, even for 10 minutes, to let them know they are special and that you love them. I asked Maggie what she and Daddy did during their time together last night while Conner and I were out. She said, “We acted silly.” How cool is that!
Schedule some one-on-one time with each of your kids today and feel the excitement! Even a short drive in the car with just one child can be turned into a special time for talking, remembering, telling jokes and just being together!